Thursday, June 02, 2005

 

Commentary on the Australian Terror Attack by Our Reporter in the Field

A Message From My Sister Regarding the Terror Threat to the Indonesian Embassy in Australia:


By now I am sure it has come to your attention that Australia has been outed as the terrorist nation I have always suspected it is.

In case you have not been following the war on terror Aussie style - although I am sure by now “our shame” (the headlines informed me this morning) is international news - an "anthrax derivative" substance (whatever the hell that is) was sent to the Indonesian Embassy in Canberra. The pictures on the news looked like one of those terror strike drills, but this was not a test – I got that line from the commercial network news. Everyone’s using it; isn’t it clever.

People in those yellow HazMet suits you see in “Plague” movies and on “Medical Investigations” – who knew they were real – showed up; a “perimeter was established” or so I was assured by someone important – he seemed very pleased with himself, but then I suppose it was nice to prove all his hard work and practice has paid off (I’m sure terrorist response units have been concerned lately. But now that we are generating our own terrorist attacks, since the other terrorist nations were not obliging, they must feel their job security is much more certain); personnel were evacuated and scrubbed (on national television so we could all see what a good job the TRU was doing – well not us exactly, but Indonesia in the hopes they won’t bomb us); there was all ‘round pandemonium. I was briefly concerned about the crowd that was watching; after all standing around watching a terrorist attack doesn’t seem the safest way to spend your lunch hour, but then no one ever accused Australians of being as smart as, say, Iraqis. At least no one helped.

There is very little discussion about who is responsible or the reasons the Indonesians were targeted ... there is general consensus it was Australians in retaliation for what has become known worldwide as the "Corby Verdict" (
see my recent email).

Although publicly condemned by the Federal government, this is likely to have little impact on the fall-out as such denials of involvement in terrorist activity are always given the dismissal they deserve. I expect therefore we have been added to America’s Terrorist Watch list as a nation supporting terrorism.

It will of course only be a matter of months before Indonesia retaliates with missile attacks. While Australia may have a more substantial military than Jakarta, it would breach international customary law to retaliate against such a sanctioned provoked response. Indonesia is fully entitled to hold the Australian government and the country at large responsible for a criminal act perpetrated by someone it is harbouring (precedent authority: USA - Clinton administration circa 1998).

Australia could avoid this by handing over the perpetrator, but they will obviously refuse to do so claiming they don’t know where he is and therefore have no way of complying. Of course this sort of rogue behaviour cannot be tolerated by the international community.

There is no precedent for a full scale military attack against Australia although strike forces could be sent in to assist aborigines in bring down the government if the Prime Minister continues to refuse to say he is sorry (see Operation Anaconda - US intervention in Afghanistan). But there can be little doubt there will be a pre-emptive strike against New Zealand also in accordance with international customary law (see USA – Bush administration circa 2003; Note: there is still some debate whether this requires a UN Security Council Resolution, but international experts generally agree even if it does it is not necessary for the Resolution to actually pass).

On a more serious note:

where did laboratory grade anthrax come from? I could be wrong but it doesn’t seem the sort of thing that should generally be just floating around the place. This may not seem to be cogent questions I realise. After all, the important questions are how much more of it is there, who has it, where will it show up next? But the question must also be asked how did someone with such questionable ideological priorities as to use perfectly good anthrax on something as lame as the Corby Verdict possibly have access to a laboratory where anthrax is available. He clearly must be a yobbo of little education, skill and emotional and mental development. So? What, did the cleaner just walk in and pocket it? Didn’t someone notice it was missing?

But really how pathetic are we if the best we can do as a terrorist nation is some guy who’s obviously listening to too much Alan Jones and John Laws (our resident middle age shock jockeys)? Even the British have the potential to recruit soccer hooligans (whose fundamentalist ideology and hatred of the infidel enemy competitor is well developed and widely known). Although the requisite lack of fundamental understanding of the cause he is fighting for is definitely present, the terrorist’s attack on the Indonesians was amateurish in its execution: for instance there was no video with him in a ski mask holding a meat pie sent to the ABC or any demands that Ms Corby be released. The most damning proof of our failure as a terrorist nation, however, is that multiple organisations have not come forward to claim responsibility for the attack.

On the up side as the situation deteriorates I will be free to contact UNHCR and resettle as a refugee in a variety of less aggressive countries like the United States or Britain where I can pursue my civil rights in peace. I know I can count on your support and sponsorship for my application.

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